Of course that’s valid 🙂 I wouldn’t get mad at someone’s preference! And I like some redhead Kurama topping Hiei sometimes, too. But I don’t like conflating “bottoming” with femininity. I don’t like Kurama on the bottom because he’s “feminine.” I think there’s a huge backlash against Kurama being on the bottom because early fandom, when the m/m fandom was still being born and we still had yaoi with lemons and limes, people would often characterize Kurama as too feminine, almost turning him into a woman, both in how he was portrayed in writing and in art. 

But I feel like we’ve moved past that. At least, I and my personal circle mostly had. To me, things such as level of femininity or masculinity have nothing to do with the top/bottom dynamic, if there even is one. In early fandom especially, there was somewhat of a love/hate relationship with m/m in general, and “gay” relationships were just portrayed completely unrealistically, including sex.

This is actually a great chance to discuss something I’ve wanted to talk about for a while.

This is mostly speculation and my limited observations, so please don’t take any offense to it. Long winded informal discussion, rant, meta??? of yaoi, femininity, uke/seme, all that, below. 

The way I saw early “yaoi” fandom, (mostly I see the term m/m being used more, though perhaps the “yaoi” term is still common in anime fandoms? I haven’t been in them in a while, so I can’t tell) a lot of people appeared to be uncomfortable with actual male on male relationships. As in, the “uke” (bottom) was always turned into essentially a woman who had a penis. Looking back, there were many shows, mangas, and fandom works that would deliberately exaggerate femininity and masculinity to achieve a more “traditional” male/female dynamic, but with two men. Case in point, with doujinshi (examples mostly from the late 90s);

Notice how exaggerated Hiei looks here, made taller, whereas Kurama is more slight, and his expressions are mostly innocent and soft. Even his eyelashes are ridiculously long.

He looks like a woman.

Other doujinshi where Kurama is “apparent bottom” follow the same cliche,

Kurama has long eyelashes, has soft features, etc. He’s not the same Kurama we know from the show. Alternatively, Hiei will get a similar treatment, either being portrayed as small and thin, feminine, or even childlike, (to portray youth and inexperience) to make him fit the pre-created role of the “uke.” Examples;

Look how incredibly thin he looks. Notice how his eyes are longer and pointed more at the corner (implying long eyelashes). Very few doujinkas draw these two as they actually are. Arina Toshimi comes close, and I adore this comic of hers specifically because she acknowledges that out of the two, Kurama is more feminine, but that doesn’t necessarily make him submissive nor does it force Hiei to become some macho man he is not (Kurama tops Hiei here, while wearing a wedding dress);

One doujinka captures them perfectly, and it is the woman who is responsible for creating their character designs for the show. I think her art is the perfect example of neither of them being forced into either role;

Notice that Kurama doesn’t have those extra feminine eyelashes we see in the first example. Hiei also isn’t made more childlike or more masculine. They’re not trying to fit a role here. They’re both themselves, and act like themselves. 

This isn’t to say it’s wrong to portray characters as more this way or that way. It’s fandom, we can do whatever we want, and each interpretation is perfectly valid for you to enjoy. But I find that most interpretations, at least in the past, forced these characters into roles rather than letting them fall into them naturally. And this is why we have the whole overly girly, wailing maiden Kurama, and the sometimes way too macho, or way too innocent Hiei. Because often people use their appearances rather than personalities to decide who is a “top” and who is a “bottom.” Again, this isn’t wrong or a crime or a criticism, but an observation, and something I personally try to avoid. 

I also am not fond of strict uke/seme dynamics. I don’t think it’s very realistic, and generally, I think most couples would experiment with the idea. Who does have strict top/bottom roles? Straight couples. Which leads me into…

Uke/Seme Roles Exist because of Heternomativity.

I think this was because women at the time were slowly rebelling against the standard dynamic of romance, but weren’t quite sure how to go about it. They didn’t actually want a man on man story (otherwise they’d be more into bara, wouldn’t they? Or want two masculine men, not one who is masculine and one who is feminine), but were aware going for a heterosexual love story would leave them with the same dynamic they’ve seen before and grew to dislike.

I know I first started thinking about gender and how I view romance because of yaoi. I preferred reading those mangas to straight romance stories because things weren’t assumed from the start. After all, when I was in middle school, it was a revolutionary thing to say that a girl can initiate the first kiss or be the one to ask for a first date. But when it’s two men, well, there is no assumption, is there?

Except that there actually was, and still is, in some cases. Because what actually happened with the genre of yaoi, at least when I was big into the scene some 5-10 years ago, was that we had the girl (uke) and guy (seme), and things were done the same exact way – the guy (seme) would pursue the girl (uke), be the one to be forward, be the one to try for a first kiss, and be the one to insert ***** into the girl’s (uke’s) ****.

In reality, no one is 100% a uke or seme. In gay couples, people will often just … go with whatever they feel like. Heck, even between men and women, where it is assumed women are “bottom” and men “top,” we can have women seize control, or even go as far as ——– (google “strap on”). So these rigid “uke/seme” roles just… seem outdated as of now.

And we also know these women didn’t want actual man on man action, because these men were almost always younger, teenagers even, one was almost always short and feminine, the other more masculine, and this dynamic would repeat itself over and over again. I can’t count the amount of yaoi shows and mangas I’ve seen where it was genuinely difficult to tell if the uke was a woman or a man.

But today we don’t really do that as much anymore. At least, I’ve mostly fallen away from that tradition. While we often will characterize someone as a top or a bottom, it isn’t always based on femininity or appearance, but more on how people act and their preferences. 

When I gave my reasons for why I prefer Kurama bottoming, I didn’t focus on Kurama’s appearance, but rather on his personality. When I “ship” in general, I tend to switch things around, mess with personalities, etc. For example, Yusuke, in a lot of fiction, was portrayed topping. With Kurama, Kurama would be more feminine, and with Hiei, Hiei would be more innocent and less aggressive. 

Example of Kurama being a pretty-faced “nagging girlfriend.” 

Hiei, as more innocent. 

In reality… let’s be real – at the very least in Hiei’s example, he wouldn’t act like that. But Yusuke is more “boyish” because he’s taller, has smaller eyes, and doesn’t wear that weird cloak/dress thing. And of course, between the two, Kurama is more likely to be seen as “the girl.”

Heck, it wasn’t that long ago that people would legitimately ask gay couples who the “girl” was in their relationship.

But nowadays I see a new trend in people foregoing these rigid rules. I see Hiei topping Yusuke, Kurama topping Hiei, Kurama topping both, both topping him (and other characters, too) – look, the point is, there’s a lot of variation. Meaning, people have stopped looking at appearances and choosing only based on that. We can have a feminine guy putting his **** into a street punk’s **** and not think it’s weird.

And unlike before, we can have two manly dudes going at it. We can have Hiei all muscled like he actually is taking it, or have Kurama have long pretty hair and have muscles, and be a total stud. We can have both. We can have “ukes” that are manly. We can have “semes” that are thin. We can have any combination, because the is no social rule that says “if you’re thinner than your partner, have less muscle, have longer hair, have prettier eyes, then you must take dick.”

 And that’s sort of my point here. 

I don’t like either extreme. I don’t like people portraying Kurama as a girl, and I don’t like people refusing to ever let anyone’s penis go near Kurama’s butt because he’s been too often characterized as a “uke.” I like people choosing based on how they think the character will act. But this is something that I’ve seen and been told at least three times since returning to the fandom – that someone didn’t like Kurama bottoming becauase of the past femininzation he was forced into, and that the extra feminization is cause for him to only be the bottom. 

A lot of people go extremely in the other direction trying to make him more masculine than he is, or try to say he is not feminine. But he is. Kurama is feminine compared to the guys, in the traditional sense of the word at least. Of course, manly man can have long hair, but long hair is more associated with women. Roses, pink/purple uniform, longer eyelashes, being more soft-spoken – all things that can be considered traditionally feminine. And that’s okay. It’s okay for men to be feminine. I feel like nowadays, a lot of people have an instinctual reaction to a feminine character being portrayed as feminine because of past fandom issues. But I don’t feel that way. I think a character can be feminine or masculine, and have that not affect his sexual preferences, his strength, or anything of the sort. 

So… super long winded, jambled mess… but my point is, let every guy feel a dick in his butt, regardless of their appearance. It’s great fun! 

– Mod Lola